Hi ! Or angry hi?
To start with, i am not actually angry about anything in Portugal. 8 years in this country have left me.... how would you say... with lower expectations. For example with bus schedules, which i will get to later.
One thing however has led me to very high expectations, in cruelty. This particular one is very mundane. It is no more, no less, than the arduous task of getting a haircut. Yes, a simple haircut. Let me explain.
Where i'm from, you go get a haircut, it goes something like this:
They: How would you like your hair cut?
Me: Shorter than it is now
They: Right, well your hair seems to be washed already so let's get to it.
Here is where 20 minutes pass and i'm done and free to go on with my life.
Not here. Ohhhhh no. Here they treat you like you're a 90 year old man and nothing you say can be taken seriously. Here it goes like this:
They: How would you like your hair cut?
Me: Shorter than it is now
They: *Illustrations of different haircuts because "shorter" is not a haircut*
Me: That one
They: Ok, now lets go wash your hair
Me: But i just washed it not 20 minutes ago
They: *the 90 year old man look, who cannot be taken seriously*
Me: *sigh* Let's go wash my hair
They: Let me turn on this massaging chair, that is really just meant to make you feel even more uncomfortable, but at the same time worth your money. While you're there feeling uncomfortable and awkward, please watch this fashion show we have playing on the ceiling TV, while people waiting their turn are watching you do exactly that.
After this unsettling experience, where you dont really know if you should smile or What, we finally get to cutting the actual hair. This part, i must admit, goes better than anything i have ever experienced in Finland. Much better. And after the haircut is done? What happens?
Another wash. With a massage. And the fashion show.
I recently found an old man, not 90 or i wouldn't take him seriously, but a man who cuts my hair in 10 minutes flat, charges 9 euros for it and believes me when i say i just washed it.
And he doesn't have a massaging chair OR a tv in the ceiling playing fashion shows.
I like this man. He reminds me of normality.